36 Truths and No Lies

April 30, 2017 Krista Hager

These days I like my coffee grinds with a filter, and my words without.

1. Unicorn Alert: Step aside folks! Trueblood Austinite right here, and I use the fact that I am from this cray cray city to excuse my own randomness, quirkiness, and awkward nature. Keepin it weird for reals right here (and not in the trendy hipster way).
2. I was a Manitou Springs Volunteer Firefighter.
3. I first went bungee jumping at the age of 12—Hello Mom and Dad! Whaaaat were you thinking?!
4. I once carried on two knives to a plane. So I totally forgot about my brother’s wedding gift in my carryon bag, and then proceeded to explain said unfortunate memory lapse to the fellow officers as they stared down stunned in utter disbelief. AND THEN they let me through ANYWAYS, WITH the knives. (Social worker in me needs to CHECK my white privilege here, but still a funny story…)
5. When I turned 30 I rock climbed my first mountain–Such an exhilarating and rewarding challenge. Since this point, the challenges have been numerous, but the rewards… stupendously astounding. This is the best time of my life. Excuse me as I just soak it in.
6. I am completely in love with fitness and physical challenges. If I can make my body do something I didn’t think was possible, my mind follows suit and begins to wonder what kind of mental barriers I can break down too.
7. I have been homeless before.
8. The act of writing literally makes my pulse quicken.
9. I am simultaneously one of the clumsiest and most coordinated people I know. Watch me as I headstand like a boss then walk out of yoga running into that wall right over there. Yep.
10. I can dance like no one is watching EVEN when people are watching. To this embarrassment… I really don’t care. It is just simply too fun to worry about what I look like.
11. And on this note.. My daughter and I have a dance party at least once a day, preferably in the morning. She also dances like no one is watching, even when people are watching… and actually prefers the audience. Tots don’t know embarrassment yet.
12. My (at this time 6 month old) son is the most squeezable little cub bear I have ever met.
13. My (at this point 2 year-old) daughter is the funniest person I have ever met.
14. I am married to the love of my life.
15. I cannot stand to wait for food to “finish” cooking in the microwave.  I feel a compulsive need to rescue the item seconds before the “BEEP.”  No idea why.  
16. I really cannot stand waiting for my hands to dry in those bathroom dryers.  For some reason, I can never have the patience to let them dry all the way.
17. I am a little-lotta crazy, and I am learning to embrace it.
18. My favorite punctuation mark is an ellipsis (Stating the obvious much)… Probably because my thoughts are numerous, fleeting, and fragmented…
19. I am a trained social worker by trade.
20. I am a HAPPILY unemployed mom that takes care of children—ON SOME DAYS IT’S DAMN HARD WORK BUT IT’S NOT MY JOB. Thank Goodness because I think my year-end review would be sketchy pending if you ask my tot verses my baby.
21. I will try almost anything even when I am scared.
22. I went to two years of law school before understanding how much I hated it.
23. I try to not care what you think but I do… I really really do. Whoops! (Which makes it sooo hard to be a blogger)
24. I understand the horror associated with standing on a cliff of reality and being uncertain what is true and what is false.
25. I am a horrid cook. BUT… The foodie in me is dying to learn so let’s do this together… Or in the very least you can laugh as I misinterpret the simplest of cooking instructions and almost cut off a few fingers learning to chop.
26. I had a miscarriage on Mother’s Day.
27. 4th of July we made a rainbow baby… our firecracker Addy. TMI? Sorry. Not Sorry.
28. These days I like my coffee grinds with a filter, and my words without.
29. I know my version of “hard” or “bad” days are actually blessings. (Side note: This doesn’t mean I don’t complain. I love to complain. It just means deep down I know I don’t really have much to complain about.)
30. I see the ordinary as so extraordinary because I have had a VERY humbling journey. (i.e. read: I am a mess!)
31. I am so imperfect it ACTUALLY makes me laugh.
32. My equilibrium is found within the crisp push and climb of the mountains, and the salty sweat and sweet release of the beach.
33. I left the good ole ATX for a seven-year healing hiatus in Manitou Springs and Denver where I by all senses of the word “FOUND” myself.
34. My baby slows me down like a sweet slow sip of wine and my toddler revs me up like the quick punch of caffeine.
35. Yoga and bootcamp are my exercise yin and yang to a life full of perfect dichotomies.
36. I am a lot stronger than I think I am… emotionally, physically, and mentally.

Stay tuned… and this blog will unfold many of these stories with time… In a nutshell from the humorous, the serious, through the brokenness, and to the beauty… my hope is this blog will provide a safe haven for a community of writers and people trying to live and write authentically.